125 Comments
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Patricia in Missoula's avatar

My goodness, this is beautiful! 🌴

Ellen Jill Clark's avatar

What a beautiful piece! Your father is very lucky to have you in his life. Your understanding and compassion regarding Alzheimers is just what he needs.

Manqueman's avatar

A beautiful piece.

🙏🏻

Nancy Wong's avatar

Glad that he is happy there…and found a friend…💛🌈🕊️

Martin C. Fredricks IV's avatar

Fact or fiction... where have I found more truth? I'd have to say fiction every time.

Deidre Lisenby's avatar

A, this piece is incredibly beautiful. I love the way you respond to him with such patience & kindness & respect. I've loved the way you write since I discovered you a few months ago. It doesn't seem possible, but to me it does appear that you get better every day. Have you published a memoir yet ?

Linden Higgins's avatar

Beautiful, thank you. You bring back memories of my Mom, from a decade ago. My mother is in end-stage Alzheimer’s now, nonverbal and very angry ; she always said she never wanted to be dependent. I’m so glad you will have these lovely memories

Renegade Crone's avatar

Very heartfelt thank you. ❣️

Deb Prothero's avatar

Such wisdom and love in one story. Thanks for sharing your experience. Is there a Venn diagram correlation of Marxists and patients with Alzheimers?

A-C M's avatar

As my mom traveled with dementia, I traveled with denial- which is equally delusional. I remember reaching that breaking point where the truth of her condition bypassed my need for it not to be so. Finally I saw how hurtful arguing with her was..I just wanted so badly to keep her tethered to the reality she could no longer access, and as her rage at losing control claimed me as its perpetrator my guilt made me hold on even more tightly.

A-C M's avatar

Our most beautiful moments were when we would both let go at once- and let laughter fill the room.

Deb Bennett's avatar

This account is so true, compassionate, and insightful. Thank you. Helps my view of the world.

Science Meets Magic's avatar

“…if you love someone with alzheimers, you meet them where they are. Correcting them is cruelty.” One of the most marvelous truths! Such wisdom shining through you!

💛

Greg Wilkinson's avatar

Thank you Alisa for your heartfelt post about your visit with your father. Your message resonates and serves as a reminder that there are times to put being “right” aside, and allow people the space to “be” in their “happy place”.

LeeAnn's avatar

I love this. Unlike my mother, who told my father that their son (my brother) had died - every day for 2 weeks while the flowers lingered in their house after his funeral. My father died of a broken heart the weeks after my brother died. The stupidity of needing to be right and telling it like it is can be so cruel. But he had dementia so he actually didn’t linger with that disease as long as he otherwise would have. A blessing in disguise for him. A tragedy for me.